Agent XX submitted a proposal to the Head Chief of P.I.M.P in hope of being promoted to Special Agent XX. However, Head Chief had not agreed to his proposal yet. She said, "See First". Agent XX felt a slight tinge of disapproval in her voice. Dejected, Agent XX went on an emo spree. He thought to himself, what hasn't he done to deserve this promotion? Was there someone else more capable than him? Or perhaps the Head Chief just disliked Agent XX. This was the first time Agent XX ever felt emo. Always, he would recover from emo-ism within the hour. But this was different. It was like the promotion meant so much to him, he could almost die without it. Embracing the truth with misery, he decided that this wasn't going to stop him from doing his best for P.I.M.P. After all, he is the one who possessed the legendary item which grants +125% Mana Regeneration, +5 Hitpoints Regeneration and +10 Damage. He wasn't going to give it up. Not because of something as minor as this. He thought he would even wait forever to get promoted, as long as P.I.M.P doesn't retrench him.

And the day after, it was the first day of GUNPOWDER SEASON! It was a first time for Agent XX to travel to VomitLand for Gunpowder Season. And to fire live rounds during the season made Agent XX overjoyed. Joined by his family, the festive mood was set. All went well, firing bullets from afternoon till late at night. When night shadowed the lands, Agent XX had just the right items and weapons to make it day again. Firing rockets and nukes into the sky, the brilliant shimmering of the explosions outshone the stars in the background. And Agent XX soon got bored of it, so he headed for the balcony to do some hunting. Armed with a rod with a line and hook, he began his conquest against the mermaid empire. Throughout the whole night, 2 enemies had been captured by Agent XX's skillful hunting proficiency. But exercising compassion, Agent XX released them back into the sea.

The second day, was also the last day of this season and everyone was to return back to Pukedom. Lest was known of a spy amongst us, until a quarrel was ignited between the outsider, that had unknowingly followed us on this trip, and my beloved aunt. Being a parent means to take full responsibility of your child, no matter his condition. Not to dump him to someone else and expect them to do your work. Sadly, this was the plummet of any festive joy that was left of everyone on this trip.

A few days later, a gathering between Agent XX's colleagues was organized thanks to their team leader, Lieutenant JX. Though the dinner was a little off the timing, it was nonetheless, Wonderful. All Agent XX wanted to say was, thank you to everyone who was present on the night, colleagues, colleague's families, LightSpeed Transport driver, and yes, even the granny who stepped on Agent XX's toes aboard the LightSpeed Transport. At the final destination, after the wonderfully sumptuous dinner, a game of Feed-the-Tiles was played between the 4 top players in Pukedom. Agent XX had lady luck smiling over him and he won the first 4 games hands down. Then Lieutenant JX commented that winning in games would indirectly equals to a bad time during work. And Agent XX thought about his failed proposal for promotion. But this time, it wasn't as bad as the previous time and Agent XX continued on his winning spree till alas, a fellow agent, Agent YZ, had ultimate tiles and won and was also fed by Agent XX, and thus Agent XX lost a bomb.

Agent XX received an order to return to base immediately, and sadly, he thanked the host and everybody else and proceeded back to base.

P.S. Your words felt like a knife.

Battle Control Terminated.

This education facility for agents train normal mortal beings into highly adept and agile killers. From killing Androids to Zealots, its an easy peasy task. But the most important lesson to be taught, is to show mercy and compassion to your fallen adversaries. In order to attain the highest level of mental state of a professional killer, one has to undergo countless battles and missions, killing only when the heart desires, and sparing when the heart feels sympathy for the fallen.

Recalling his past, Agent XX once skirmished at the undersea cavern near Atlantis. There was pandemonium everywhere upon the battlefield. The fishes formed The Alliance, and the humans formed The Agents. When war was coming to an end, Agent XX managed to infiltrate the undersea castle, where Neptune, the King of Fishes resides. With a knife to his throat, Agent XX demanded The Alliance to withdraw or he shall die. Ariel, the Mermaid Princess, witness this nerve-numbing act and rushes to Agent XX's side to plea for her dad's mercy.

Touched by true love, Agent XX started to feel sympathy for Neptune and thus withdrew his knife. When Agent XX was about to leave, Neptune threw his magical trident at the back of Agent XX, rendering him paralyzed from waist down. Seizing this opportunity, Neptune quickly rounded up his royal guards and set Agent XX into confinement with round the clock security. Feeling betrayed, Agent XX's heart burned fiercely with hatred.

Because Agent XX was once an engineer, he managed to find a way out of the prison cell. And made his way to the royal highness, Ariel's bedroom. Under the glowing effect of the deep sea lamps, Agent XX suddenly saw Ariel's true beauty. Mesmerized, he bent over her bed and leaned his head close to her. Captivated by her breath, a sudden wave of warm, fuzzy feeling rushed all over Agent XX. And their lips touched.

Awoken abruptly, Ariel sounded the emergency alarm. Within seconds, guards filled up every inch of Ariel's bedroom. Feeling threatened, Agent XX held Ariel hostage. With a sharp comb swiped from the princess's bedside cabinet, Agent XX bargained his freedom with the life of Ariel. Within his heart, Agent XX was very remorseful for needing to do this. But it is the only way he is ever able to get out of the castle.

Neptune trembled at the sight of his beloved daughter being held hostage. He promptly agreed to every condition set forth by Agent XX. Only through this way, had Agent XX managed to survive. Upon reaching the surface, Agent XX kept hold to his promise and allowed Ariel to return home. But not before divulging the secrets of his heart to Ariel. Like star-crossed lovers, they were not meant to be together. And Agent XX cherished no hopes of ever being able to be together with Ariel after what he had done to her. He felt disgusted at himself.

P.S. I'm always getting over you.

Battle Control Terminated.

Upon return to P.I.M.P HQ, and to everyone's surprise, Captain was sitting in the cafeteria sipping away at his cup of tea. Enraged, Agent XX and his 2 colleagues decided to file a report regarding Captain's irresponsible behavior. After much discussion, the 3 agents decided to reduce the proposed punishment of Captain from being dismissed from P.I.M.P to serving 3 days in solitary confinement. But because the Captain showed no sign of repentance or remorse, Agent XX has never really forgave the Captain. Deep within his heart, he was silently cursing the Captain like a vengeful spirit.

Back in his bunk, Agent XX laid on the bed staring through the dusty windows at the lonely moon who seemed to understand how he felt. Recalling from his memories, a random phase of his life where he was still an engineer. The most wonderful structure that Agent XX believed was ever created was the Taj Mahal. Built in memory of his favorite wife, Mumtaz Mahal, Emperor Shah Jahan spent fortunes on the architects and craftsmen to complete the Taj Mahal in 20 years.



Everyone awed at the sight of the Taj Mahal and also at the proof of the Emperor's love to his wife. The concrete that formed the outer layer of the Taj Mahal was beautifully sculptured and crafted, also dotted with countless precious stones, like the stars in the sky of a cloudless night. However, no one noticed or even paid attention to the foundation lying within the Taj Mahal. Without the support from the humble skeletal foundation, the Taj Mahal wouldn't be standing till this date.

Agent XX kept thinking about the foundation of the Taj Mahal. It would never be as pretty or wonderful as the exterior, but it would be happy to have been able to make this wonderful structure possible. It has fulfilled the very purpose of its existence, and it would never complain about the weight of the extravagant exterior resting upon its shoulders. Unknowingly, Agent XX drifted into a deep slumber..

After breakfast the next day, Agent XX regurgitated all of his meal out, like a geyser spewing water hundred of feet into the air. It must have been the awkward position that he slept in the previous night starting at the moon. A very graphic image was taken while Agent XX was performing his fountain of youth.

Agent XX was immediately sent to P.I.M.P Medical Facility for a full body check-up and sanitation, to check for the cause of regurgitation, and also to prevent the possible outbreak of an infection within P.I.M.P HQ. Agent XX spent the next 3 days stranded within the facility undergoing tests every single moment of the day. After ensuring that Agent XX was free from any infectious diseases, he was released. And his bunk was his world for the whole week while he recuperate from the mental stress and lack of nutrients due to the tests carried out.

P.S. You don't know me and you don't even care.

Battle Control Terminated.

As he set foot into the twilight, all was dark and everything was indistinguishable to Agent XX's naked eyes. He knew that the only way to reach the checkpoint in time was to trust his Captain, Agent XYYX. His other team members too, felt the same way. After clearing hordes upon hordes of Undead Pukers, the only obstacle left was getting out of this abyss. And this responsibility lies with the Captain. Setting up camp and a 50m perimeter, the team decided to rest till dawn before moving on towards the final checkpoint. Everyone took turns to stay on guard duty with 2 hour shifts each. Agent XX was third, and the Captain was last.

The night progessed quietly, free from any encounter with the living dead. Finally, it was the Captain's turn to be on the lookout. Exhausted from all the rush during the day, the 3 agents slept peacefully. If it weren't for the rise and fall of their chests due to breathing, they would as though appeared dead to anyone who saw them. The early morning rays from the majestic sun beamed down upon the camp. Agent XX and his colleagues woke with a startle. They were supposed to have arrived at the final checkpoint and await a rescue squad before the sun rose beyond the horizon.

The scorching morning sun seemed unaware of the dangers it had just unleashed upon the agents. With sunlight, the Undead Pukers will now be able to see clearly and the sun's glaring rays and heat only agitated them further, making them so much more aggressive. To their dismay, the Captain could not be found anywhere! The agents started panicking, constantly radioing for their Captain. After several failed attempts, they concluded that the Captain must have left them and headed for the rescue point by himself, when the sky was darkest before dawn.

Collecting themselves together, the group of three began to scout for any paths that may lead them out of this maze-like forest that they had been stranded in ever since they barely escaped The Abomination 3 days ago. The Abomination had regurgitated its stomach acid onto the Captain during an ambush, almost blinding him. But now, with no one left to guide them, it is time to improvise. Climbing up the tallest tree they could see, Agent XX scouted for the rescue checkpoint. He had been told that there would be smoke signals to mark the location, and indeed there was, a few clicks in the north-east direction. Using the position of the sun as a compass, they began hiking towards the final destination.

Eventually, they reached a valley, the infamous Valley of Lost Souls. And it was the only seperation between them and their long-awaited rescue. Agent XX started building a fire in hope of attracting the attention of the outpost situated there. Abruptly, their radio started crackling with static and a faint voice could be heard. It was sent out by the sentry that was on duty at the outpost. He gave instructions to stay put while a rescue chopper is sent out.

A shriek could be heard from within the shadowy canopy of the forest. It was the Wtich! The crunching sounds of branches snapping from the tremendous force and agility the Witch possessed was echoing throughout the valley. And it stopped. Slowly but steadily, 2 red glowing eyes are visible through a bush directly in front of Agent XX. And the sorrowful cries of the Witch trembled the very marrow of the bones within each agent. As she started to hunch forward in a posture ready to pounce, a gunshot was heard. And the Witch went silent, while she slumped to the floor as every muscle of her limbs began to lose their tension. The precise shot from the sentry guard left a hole between the red glowing eyes of the creature that was so vile and raged just a second ago.

At this moment, the chopper arrived with 2 rope ladders dangling from it. Holding on to their lifelines, the three agents had finally left this god-forsaken place. But the memories of this nightmarish landscape will forever be etched in their minds. And whenever Agent XX closes his eyes, two bright red orbs will slowly be visible from within the depths of his mind...


P.S. Just so you know, this feeling's taking control of me.

Battle Control Terminated.

In commemoration of 2,000 visits to my top-secret military journal, I will be releasing a draft of the upcoming chapter, The Rise of a Gallon Puke.

Upon the completion of Mission: Final Battle of Pukedom, Agent XX is now left with pretty much, nothing to do except to clean up the puddles upon puddles of puke left after the aftermath. And not to forget the tons of paperwork and reports required to be submitted to P.I.M.P HeadQuarter before the end of the month.

Life has become pretty mundane and repetitive for Agent XX. Without the action and adventures, Agent XX feels like a robot. He yearns for some hardcore Puke-Dynamic action for the upcoming VaporizingPuke Day. VaporizingPuke Day is a very special day once a year where Agents from all over the globe come together to vapourize puke together, hand-in-hand and in pairs. It holds significant impact to Agent XX's life because it might double celebration for him. Or triple. Or quadruple. Or quintuple. Or hextuple. Or septuple. Or octuple. Or nonuple. Or decuple. And so on and so forth.

Agent XX is thinking of creating a little bit of action for himself. However, he can't seem to nail down a perfect plan for perfect action on the perfect day at the perfect time. Perhaps a family reunion soon would be the perfect appetizer for some hardcore Puke-Action down the road. But damn those paperworks, Agent XX doesn't have time to entertain any such thoughts. Furthermore, he has his semestral Agent License test to worry about. Sadly, it falls exactly on two days after VaporizingPuke Day. And hence, Agent XX believes that it isn't gonna be much fun.

On a happier tone, Agent XX has finished 1 of his reports, on Ammunition Management, with 3 other assesments left to be completed. The remaining three comprises of Puke System Analysis & Design, Law and Governance of Pukedom, and lastly, Inba Puking Techniques Program. Luckily, Law and Governance of Pukedom is almost completed, with just a reflection left to go, while Puke System Analysis & Design had been 50% completed with the help of fellow colleagues but last of all, Inba Puking Techniques Program has yet to be considered as officially started.

Looking at how gloomily things appear to be for Agent XX, I, the author, am going to take a break from Puketomia for a while.

Signing off, PukeMaster.

P.S. When you fall in love with madness, you are bound to go insane.

Battle Control Terminated.

A lone Agent.
A secret mission.
A secret message.
A secret weapon.

Agent XX woke with anticipation for the mission he is going to execute later. As the bright golden rays of the giant ball of fire in the sky scotched Agent XX's butt, Agent XX knew the time was then. Assembling together his package of killer looks and civilian disguise, he set forth into enemy's territory. Agent XX was on a stealth mission. Everything must be executed according to plan or it would all be for naught. Blending in to the crowds of Puke-noids aboard the Lighteningly Rapid Transportation (LRT), the hunt has began. Upon reaching the target location, a reliable information was received from another secret agent. Target has decided to change her checkpoint. Target : Agent YY.

Agent XX had no choice, forsaking the element of suprise, Agent XX ambushed his target within McPukenald's. To Agent XX's astonishment, his target hadn't believe the ploy he set up. Taking Agent YY hostage, they travelled to the city of Wraffles, Wraffles City. Agent XX knew a secret teleportation device there which can transport its passengers to the highest point in all of Townsvania. Upon arrival at the peak, BabyAgent Snow-White started taking pictures as evidence for their ransom letter for Agent YY's release.

Items in exchange for Agent YY's release : DigiCam.














Coming back down to Earth, Agent YY's commander-in-chief, decided to bail Agent YY out and handed over the DigiCam for Agent YY's freedom. BabyAgent Snow-White and Agent YY herself went to collect the ransom. Proceeding with caution, the 3 Agents infiltrated Wraffles City command centre. Sadly, this was where they had to part.

Agent XX received an urgent SOS from his colleagues and he had to leave. BUT, before the farewell, Agent XX delivered a top-secret military package for Agent YY, to commemorate her 16th intiation anniversary into the P.I.M.P. =) After delivery is done, Agent XX rushed off to his comrades' aid.

After Agent XX's arrival, his group of agents started attacking furiously away at the food within the buffet. After 2 rounds of furious fighting, Agent XX triumphed and left the arena. Recreation was next, to celebrate this victory. And time flew, practically. By then the darkness had descended upon the lands. The band of agents split into 2 and Agent XX's team led the support. Gathering up the secret stashes of supplies from a secret location, they hurried to the other team's destination to support them.

Upon arrival, a field training was soon intiated. Agent XX was the first to be coordinately targeted by his fellow comrades. However, firmly he stood in his position! Refusing to give in, Agent XX perservered. Getting bored of Agent XX, his fellow comrades started to target other colleagues. And very soon, an agent has fallen. And sadly, he spent the magical moment of 1/1/2009 00:00am within the confinements of a toilet. And at this moment, Agent XX alerted Agent YY using his uber-long-ranged walkie talkie, and said Happy New Year or something like that and loads of other rubbish too..

And the night ended when Agent XX slowly drifted into unconsciousness...
AND LASTLY, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

P.S. You are my declaration.

Battle Control Terminated.